PDF Its NEVER about the money...even when it is.: How To Untangle Your Emotions From Your Money

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Sifting through my feelings in order to gain a better understanding of their root left me more upset than I initially felt. On a weekly basis, I sat in my therapist's office working through the ebbs and flows that were associated with changing my coping strategies. There were some appointments where I would leave Dr.

R's office feeling angry that in the weeks of making adjustments the only noticeable change was going to the grocery store without having a panic attack. Other appointments would be spent sitting in her office releasing unanticipated tears brought on my conversations I had never been able to have before about age-inappropriate situations that transpired when I was kid struggling to cope.

As the emotional baggage began to be examined and dealt with, the heaviness that had been weighing me down began to diminish.

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The ability to move forward towards the surface, away from rock bottom began to be met with less resistance. Continuously incorporating self-preservation techniques rather than reverting to the auto-pilot mode that most of life had been operated by has been something I work towards every day. Reflection and awareness of self has gradually become an integrated lifestyle habit, rather than automatically repressing feelings that feel overwhelmingly complicated to handle. I have also maintained distance from people, including family members, who subconsciously bring their own cloud of toxicity to all of their relationships.

Despite knowing that creating and maintaining boundaries within these relationships has made the most profound impact on my emotional stability, at many points it has been really, really hard to uphold. But you know what else is really hard? Being suffocated by the crushing weight of depression, anxiety and low-self esteem when you are barely an adult.

And knowing that there are decades of life ahead that are starting to resemble the sights and sounds of an existence you swore would never be replicated. In the two years since penning the article about the realization of hitting my emotional rock bottom, keeping afloat is no longer a constant battle draining the quality of my life. During this time, I have been able to flourish at a new job that has brought financial and professional advancements.

The upside of saying “no” – why it will help you build a life you love

Friendships have been more enjoyable with a new found ability to be present in the moment rather than distracted by depression. Self-soothing after a difficult day at work involves bubble baths, extra snuggle time with my cat and working through solutions of how to make the following day more manageable. A kinder, internal dialogue filled with self-imposed questions in order to understand my reasoning behind actions and emotions has replaced the previous instinctive mental boxing match where the only results seemed to be nonproductive self-loathing.

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Everyday subconscious interactions like entering a room of strangers, genuinely wanting to make plans with friend and even looking at myself in the bathroom mirror while brushing my teeth in the morning are no longer painful. My body has become more comfortable to be in again through my commitment to the nutritional aspect of self-care that focuses on healthier food choices and additional physical activity stemming from increased energy.

Over time, the impact of awareness became noticeable to those around me. There is no way it could have been published on its own merits.

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Way too many plugs for websites and other products. You should never have to pay to listen to an advertisement. I am a finance book junky, probably because I make some mistakes when I was in my 20's and reading and listening to them helps keep me focused on what is important to me. Trust me, there are much better books out there. If you want some sound financial advice, don't waist your money here. What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you? Has Money, A Love Story turned you off from other books in this genre?

What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment? Made myself listen to the end, thinking this had to get better. Unfortunately, it did not.

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  • It also seems like one big advertisement for her MLM business. Then start to prioritize, and see if you can come up with things in common. The point is that both sides should be considered, and you should look for a win-win solution or compromise so that you can both be happy. Remove emotions from financial talk. Often financial issues are tied up in all kinds of emotional issues, stemming from childhood, from issues of security to feeling like your way is better to feeling hurt if your way of spending is criticized in any way, and much more.

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    Simply talk about your financial goals, developing a plan for getting to those goals, developing a system for dealing with finances, and so forth. Again, think of this as a team effort, not as a you-vs-me effort.

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    Come up with a plan to meet your goals. Start by having a definite timeframe for each goal, and then figure out how much you need to save or pay towards debt each month to get to your goals. I had 22 jobs and six businesses, always restlessly looking for the 'bell' to chime; to hear and see what resonated with my values, what gave my life meaning.

    I graduated college with a degree in Film and Fine Arts from New York University, but had fallen in love with the food business and sent myself off to study at the Culinary Institute in New York. I left the grind of the food business for the construction industry thinking it would be easier.

    I ended up working seven days a week. I had started a restoration company working for the Insurance industry, and although I made a lot of money, it was ruining my health. In , I sold the restoration business, got married and took a year off.